WHAT IS

Intimacy Coaching?

Why Should You Work With an Intimacy Coach?

  • You are cordial and communicate about the day-to-day, but between your professional lives and the lives of your children, there just isn’t enough time for you and your spouse to connect-at least not the way you wish you would.
  • It might seem like your spouse is the problem…but the root cause problem isn’t either one of you–it’s that you don’t have the education to know how to change this. You don’t know where to begin.
  • An intimacy coach will show you how to create the relationship you want by teaching you how to reignite intimacy, playfulness, and passion.
  • After their first session, couples feel a new sense of hope. You’ll understand what is happening between the two of you at a deeper level and what to do about it. Once you’re no longer stuck, you’ll imagine a future that excites you; connection and pleasure will finally be within reach.

What Does An Intimacy Coach Do?

Walks you through a process

 that results in the deliciousness of a joyful and growth oriented
relationship. It’s a journey in which both partners are supported in
learning to express themselves fully.

You’ll learn how to maintain

your busy professional life without sacrificing a beautiful, nourishing partnership. And everything that goes along with that.

In my program

I teach couples the six qualities that are key to creating an intimate marriage. It has worked for my marriage, thousands of other couples,  and continues to produce incredible results for all of my current clients.

Can An Intimacy Coach Help You
With Your Sex Life?

Yes! Of course. However, one of the most surprising discoveries at the start of my career was finding that I could help couples improve their sex life without ever talking about sex. Most of the time, once a couple communicates about their thoughts and feelings with vulnerability and kindness, they no longer need me to coach them on the sensual and sexual parts of their relationship. Suddenly, it’s all so much easier to make love and feel good together.

(And when explicit focus on what is happening in the bedroom is needed, it is of great benefit for a couple to have already learned to communicate well.)

True Intimacy Is a Learnable Skill

Having a fantastic and passionate relationship is something that anyone can learn. All that is required is education but most people haven’t ever been taught. What people learn from their parents, sex ed classes, clergy, movies, books, peers or porn is wholly inadequate. With attention and the right education, comes more closeness, pleasure, and joy. With the right skills you’ll communicate better and understand your partner more deeply without sacrificing any parts of yourself.

Benefits Of Having An Intimacy Coach

  • Re-ignite the passion in your relationship.
  • Fall in love with your partner again.
  • Feel more confident being yourself and asserting your needs, knowing that doing so won’t damage your relationship.
  • Understand your partner better.
  • Learn how to use everything that arises between you (both the tense moments and the wonderful ones) to build more connection.
  • Let go of past hurts and create a growth-oriented relationship.

Types of Intimacy Coaching

Relationship Coaching

Relationship coaching is for individuals and couples who want to feel more satisfied in their relationships. The primary objective of relationship coaching is to improve communication, enhance understanding, resolve conflicts, and foster a deeper emotional connection between partners.

The Key Areas A Relationship Coach Focuses On

Communication Skills
Effective communication is the cornerstone of any strong relationship. Relationship Coaching focuses on teaching partners to listen attentively and express their thoughts and feelings clearly and respectfully. This involves understanding verbal and non-verbal cues and responding appropriately.

Conflict Resolution
Conflicts are natural in any relationship, but how they are managed can significantly affect relationship quality. Relationship coaches provide strategies to handle disagreements constructively, without resentment or anger, aiming for resolutions that satisfy both parties.

Emotional Intimacy
Building emotional intimacy involves encouraging partners to be present and self-aware, facilitating a deeper emotional bond. Relationship coaches work with individuals to recognize and express their needs and emotions clearly, enhancing the emotional connection within their relationship.

Benefits of Relationship Coaching

Relationship Coaching offers numerous benefits, including improved relationship satisfaction and enhanced understanding between partners. Couples who engage in effective Relationship Coaching often find renewed affection and appreciation for each other, benefiting from enhanced communication and conflict resolution skills that lead to more joyful and less stressful interactions.

Relationship Coaching provides new perspectives on each partner’s needs and behaviors, aiding both individuals in understanding how to meet these needs in mutually beneficial ways. This promotes a healthier, more balanced relationship and fosters a deeper connection between partners.

Sex Coaching

Sex Coaching focuses on the sexual dimension of relationships, addressing topics from communication in the bedroom to increasing overall sexual satisfaction and pleasure. It provides a confidential space for individuals and couples to explore and express their sexual desires.

The Common Issues Sex Coaching Addresses

Desire Mismatch
Sex Coaching addresses differences in sexual desire between partners, helping them find common ground or balance their needs in a respectful and satisfying manner.

 

Pleasure
Sex coaches work with individuals and couples on how to enhance pleasure, exploring personal and mutual desires, preferences, and techniques.

 

Performance Anxiety
This involves addressing concerns related to sexual performance, including anxiety, stress, and self-consciousness that can hinder a satisfying sexual relationship.

 

Sexual Challenges
Sex Coaching covers specific sexual challenges like erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and painful intercourse. It offers strategies to initiate sex confidently and comfortably.

Benefits of Sex Coaching

Sex Coaching brings several advantages, notably increased sexual confidence and improved sexual communication. My clients frequently experience a significant boost in sexual confidence through coaching, gaining clarity about their desires, and feeling empowered to pursue them.

Sex Coaching creates an environment where individuals can discuss their sexual needs and desires openly and without judgment. This open communication fosters more satisfying sexual experiences and enhances overall relationship intimacy.

Somatic Coaching

Somatic Coaching emphasizes the importance of body awareness and integrates physical experiences with emotional and psychological growth. It focuses on how bodily experiences contribute to self-awareness and personal change.

Techniques Used in Somatic Coaching

Mindfulness and Presence in the Body
This technique cultivates a nuanced awareness of bodily sensations, encouraging a person to connect more deeply with their physical selves through mindfulness practices.

Movement Practices
Somatic Coaching incorporates movement to enhance sensory integration and expressiveness. This includes dance, yoga, or other activities emphasizing body movement and awareness.

Benefits of Somatic Coaching

Somatic Coaching offers many benefits, including greater body awareness and integration and improved emotional regulation. By learning to tune into and honor their body’s signals and messages, people develop a deeper connection with their physical selves. A person can achieve better emotional regulation through increased body awareness, learning to experience their emotions without becoming overwhelmed. This contributes to overall mental and emotional well-being.

What Kind Of Intimacy Coaching Will You
Experience With Dr Alexandra?

Dr. Alexandra always starts by asking what you want to experience in your relationship, and what you are experiencing now. Once that gap is established, she will coach you on how to close it; you’ll learn to create the flavors of intimacy you want and the communication necessary to do so. Her private coaching is highly customized based on your personalities, desires, and the blocks that are keeping you from enjoying the intimacy you crave.

She always starts with communication, so you learn how to articulate what you want in a way that your partner can hear it. Longstanding frustration melts away as you learn to listen without feeling threatened and express yourself with kindness and courage. Sometimes that’s enough for intimacy to blossom.

When heartfelt communication and emotional intimacy isn’t enough, Dr. Alexandra will guide you in how to touch one another, practicing in platonic ways during sessions, fully-clothed, with instructions on how to explore with romance and sensuality on your own.

If you want to do this on your own, the Aligned & Hot Marriage program will show you. In Dr. Alexandra’s independent study program, you’ll watch short videos and go through fun exercises to foster curiosity and connection. You’re sure to experience more emotional intimacy, starting with the very first exercise.

When you’re ready to invest time, attention, and resources to experience nuanced, effective private relationship and intimacy coaching, fill out this application here: https://alexandrastockwell.com/apply-for-coaching

What Happens in Your First Relationship and Intimacy Coaching Session?

Before the session, you and your partner will be asked to fill out a questionnaire, in order to
convey your experiences, challenges, and desires.

In your first session your coach will start by asking questions in order to identify where
you are in your relationship.

Your coach will also want to hear what your relationship goals are,
(helping you identify them as needed). This is your chance to dream big and authentically state what you want.

 

Your coach will describe your personal roadmap for your relationship journey, beginning with where you are now and leading to where you want your relationship to be. Your coach will describe the landscape along the way and articulate milestones you’ll experience so you know what is involved in transforming your marriage into the intimate, connected relationship you desire. 

Finding An Intimacy Coach
That’s Right For You

First of all, it’s normal to have challenges in intimacy. No one comes to their wedding day fully informed about creating emotional connection and long lasting passion. The main distinction between those with joy-filled, nourishing relationships, and those dealing with disappointment, loneliness, numbness, and yearning in their marriage, is a willingness to learn how to have a fantastic relationship.

For high-achieving professionals, it can feel like you need to dumb down to connect with a therapist, coach, or counselor, because they can’t meet you where you are. To get the results you desire, you need to trust you’ll be seen for your intellectual prowess and unspoken tenderness as you navigate challenges in your relationship you never expected to have.

An excellent intimacy coach will provide you with missing education and illuminate your blind spots. You’ll want this delivered with kindness and precision, so it’s easy to incorporate the lessons into your relationship.

Individuals often think the problems in their marriage are either due to the shortcomings of their partner, or of themselves, but that’s never the whole story. Intimacy coaching will address your individual needs and desires, as well as the dynamic between you–you’ve co-created the situation and you’ll transform it together.

I know if you could improve things on your own, you would have already done so. This isn’t about using canned communication scripts or pushing through awkwardness expecting a different result. It’s about learning to be with your partner, and yourself, in ways that feel authentic rather than performative.

When it comes to some professions, book learning and intellectual expertise are all that’s required. When finding an intimacy coach that’s right for you, those are certainly important, but so is your coach’s presence, how you feel when you interact with them, how much you trust them, and the degree to which they walk their talk in their own lives. As an Intimate Marriage Expert who has been married for 28 years, I know how challenging intimacy can be. I also know how glorious it can be and I want you to experience that too.

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Get the roadmap for the intimacy you desire by reading the first chapter of my book “Uncompromising Intimacy.”

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