I officiated a wedding.

Wedding officiant–that’s what I was this past weekend as I celebrated the marriage of two of my wonderful clients.

They chose a gorgeous setting in Sonoma County, near the ocean and in the magnificent rural landscape of northern California. The whole affair was elegant and warm, with family from all over the country and Europe in attendance.

I coached this couple for four months and was able to bring to the ceremony the depth and intensity of their love and the challenges they have overcome to joyfully, and with open hearts, merge their lives together.

I think one of my favorite moments of the weekend was hearing them express their vows, hearing them express their love and the clarity with which they see one another.

This was also very meaningful to me because my mother officiated many weddings and I used to eavesdrop in on her conversations about practical matters, and the purpose and meaning in the ceremony.

This is me, at the beginning of the ceremony, watching in awe as the groom and his father walked down the aisle together.

I felt close to her as I performed that role, drawing on her energy which continues to be available 17 years after she took her last breath.

It meant that giving generously to this couple fed me deeply in ways they couldn’t have known…

In preparing for the ceremony I thought a lot about this wonderful couple, and also about marriage in general. Here is an excerpt from the ceremony.

“Marriage is like a garden. It requires ongoing tending, or the beauty is lost. With consistent attention, there are exquisite blossoms…marvelous scents, incredible colors, and breathtaking shapes. In every flower, there are mysteries to discover, new patterns to see and more delight to be had.

The key is remembering to put in the time, and attention, for the garden to thrive, to remove the inevitable and often persistent weeds in order to keep everything vibrant…

Marriage is not for the faint of heart, even as the rewards are among the best that life offers.”

Does this ring true for you?

What analogy would you use, to describe the experience of being in a committed relationship for a very long time?

I truly would love to hear, email me at alexandras@alexandrastockwell.com.

I hope you are enjoying the transition from summer to fall, with the equinox between them.


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