My Prescription For An Intimate Marriage

An intimate, passionate, juicy, dynamic, growth oriented relationship is contingent upon implementing and embodying the following six keys:

Cultivate curiosity
Embrace honesty
Be kind
Choose happiness
Take responsibility
Seek growth


I’ve listed the keys in the order which are easiest to implement, however, these keys do not need to be taken up in any particular order. Whether you start with #2, or #5 – it really doesn’t matter because all 6 keys are interwoven with one another. What’s important is that you need to have all 6 keys to achieve a truly intimate marriage. Think of it like baking. It may not matter which order you put the ingredients in the mixing bowl, but if you leave something out it will not taste nearly as delicious.


At first glance, you may conclude that these keys are pretty straightforward. After all, you’re already familiar with each of these words and the concepts they convey. But the real work lies in delving into what each of these keys means in the context of creating an intimate marriage and how to do so in your particular marriage. Each key represents a rich reservoir of wisdom and ways of being, while also pointing to a very specific set of tools and instructions. Using them will allow you to experience more emotional intimacy, more pleasure and more connection.

If I were to hand you a prescription for an intimate marriage, it would say the 6 keys I’ve listed above. And just like aspirin, or any other medicine, these six keys work in so many different contexts. It’s truly incredible the wide range of their application.

For example, I worked with a couple that had been married for 34 years. They were compatible and they had the same values, both devoted to raising their children while being fiscally responsible. They had very little conflict throughout the whole 34 years of their marriage. In fact, they never had an actual fight, just some disagreements which happened in muted tones. Ultimately, their marriage evolved into a kind of roommate-like companionship.


When they made the intentional decision to prioritize their marriage, they spent time learning about each of these six keys. As they explored each key in depth, they realized they didn’t need something brand new–they just needed to put attention on the beautiful aspects of their marriage which had been available all along. This realization, that came through implementing the 6 keys shifting everything and it seemed that suddenly everything was seasoned with joy.


They found there was more flirtatious energy between them, more connection, more pleasure, and an overall sense of more gratification. It was incredible for them to feel how their dehydrated relationship became juicy. They got to know themselves and one another as more magnetic, engaging, passionate people.


I also gave this prescription to a couple whom I coached about 16 months into the pandemic. One of them is a trauma surgeon and the other one is a family medicine doctor. Both of them were completely overwhelmed by caring for patients during the pandemic.

This couple loved one another deeply. They had three children and had been married for 16 years. Because of the pandemic though, they each felt tapped out of resources and had no energy left to be present and connect with one another. His libido decreased significantly and he didn’t know what to do with all the complicated and frustrating feelings he was having about his work situation. So, instead of learning how to work through his feelings, he pulled the plug on feeling them altogether; he became distant and numb.


She missed him and wanted to grow closer, but with all the professional and now also personal stress, they were growing further apart. This is when she persuaded him to enroll in the Aligned And Hot Marriage program, where I give really simple, precise, effective, efficient, and inspiring guidance on how to implement the 6 keys to an intimate marriage.


It’s amazing to see this couple since they completed the program. They’ve found the capacity to manage their emotions on an individual level, and within their relationship. In the end, because they enrolled in the program, the pandemic functioned to bring them closer together. After the Aligned & Hot Marriage program, neither of them felt alone anymore,. They found a way to connect both through beautiful communication as well as feeling together in silence.

If you want more closeness and better communication with your partner, more physical, sensual or erotic intimacy, and an intimate marriage of the highest order, then please take my prescription for an intimate marriage:


Cultivate curiosity, embrace honesty, be kind, choose happiness, take responsibility and seek growth.


Wondering where to get started? Read my book Uncompromising Intimacy, and check out my programs and pick the one that’s right for you!


For more on this topic, be sure to listen to this episode of The intimate Marriage Podcast called “My Prescription For An Intimate Marriage”.

Discover what's really blocking emotional and sensual intimacy.

Read the first chapter of Uncompromising Intimacy


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About Dr. Alexandra

Alexandra Stockwell, MD, aka “The Intimacy Doctor,” is widely known for her ability to catalyze immediate and profound shifts in high achieving couples who want it all–genuine emotional connection, sensual passion, and erotic intimacy.

A physician coach and Intimate Marriage Expert, Alexandra is the best-selling author of “Uncompromising Intimacy,” host of The Intimate Marriage Podcast, as well as a wife of 28 years and a mother of 4. Couples who work with her discover the key to passion, fulfillment, intimacy, and success isn’t compromise–it’s being unwilling to compromise–because when both people feel free to be themselves, the relationship is juicy, erotically alive, and deeply nourishing.


Get the roadmap for the intimacy you desire by reading the first chapter of my book “Uncompromising Intimacy.”

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