Some variation of “compromise more” is probably the most common, universally accepted piece of relationship advice—the idea being that if you learn to meet your partner halfway, you’ll both be happy. But as a relationship and intimacy expert who has been guiding couples for 20 years, I don’t think that advice is actually true.
In my time as a relationship and intimacy expert, I’ve seen a lot of couples who aren’t thinking about divorce and appear from the outside to be happily married and doing fine—but they used to have sex, and now they just… aren’t. And that means that no, they aren’t doing fine.
"The most commonly understood distinction between lust and love is that lust is purely physical and sexual, whereas love includes care for someone well behind their function as a source of yearning and sexual gratification," says Alexandra Stockwell, MD, a Relationship and Intimacy Expert at Alexandra Stockwell Coaching and Consulting.
Throughout the country, couples have been spending pretty much all of their time together, day in and day out. For most couples it took some time — and a lot of trial and error — to figure out a new routine that worked for both people. And now it's all changing again as couples anticipate one or both of them returning to work.
Throughout America, couples who typically only see each other on evenings and weekends are now together all day long. Whether one or both are working, or they are currently unemployed, this creates seismic shifts in the relationship. For some it can be a wonderful time to deepen the bond between them. For others, it leads to tensions and clashes that could be potential precursors to divorce.
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You might sometimes hear people making jokes about how long someone "lasts" in bed, usually in reference to men. But how long sex "lasts" for women is a complicated question because it's mixing together a lot of assumptions about what acts are involved in a sexual encounter, how important orgasms are, and how women's orgasms actually work.
It may appear taboo, but having sex during your period can be great for your overall well-being. Today, couples are often comfier having sex than talking about it. But the truth is, sex is an opportunity to explore not only your relationship with your partner but also your relationship with yourself. Period sex is no different.
Ever since sleeping late and working in your PJs has become the norm instead of the exception, mastering the art of self-motivation has never been more crucial.
Unrealized potential. There's a ring of melancholia to it, a mourning for what might've been that brings to mind Marlon Brando's unforgettable,“I coulda been a contender,” line from “On The Waterfront.” The theme of chances not taken, is universally relatable, maybe because what prevents many of us from moving ahead is an unwillingness to push beyond self-imposed fears. And those fears — aka the devil on your shoulder — can feel extremely powerful. Eyes open or closed, this defeatist talk is eve
Women need to stop pressuring other women to want children
So many different elements play a role in how healthy you are as you age. As you get older, your immune system weakens, your mental health can take a hit, and your risk for certain diseases increases.
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Children of mothers who experienced perinatal depression have a 70 percent higher risk of developing depression in adolescence and adulthood.
You made it through week one of the school shutdown, in the face of the coronavirus pandemic. It wasn’t that bad, was it? Instead of hustling out the door in the morning, maybe you enjoyed a second cup of coffee (or actually finished your first cup). And you’re beginning to get the hang of telecommuting.
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Unadulterated, consensual, fabulous sex is often a taboo topic. Many people don’t realize that in addition to being fun, there are many health benefits of sex—30 to be exact!
Do you want to delight in your partner again?
If you're ready for your relationship to feel as good on the inside as it looks on the outside, read this.
Get started with a complementary free chapter from Alexandra’s acclaimed bestselling book “Uncompromising Intimacy”